Conceal, don't feel? I'll let him know
by R'Peach
Summary: "And as I look at Natsu, I realize: he's still here. Future Lucy's reality is yet to happen, we can still change it!" ... Lucy won't let destiny control her life. She'll fight for what she wants, and for the person she wants... a small fanfic in Lucy's POV


To all NaLu fans: We are suffering with the anime right now, but good days will come! Stay strong!

Here's a small fanfic, in Lucy's POV... :) I hope you like it*

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**Conceal, don't feel? ... _I'll let him know_**

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Everyone in the living room has their eyes set on her… Me… Ugh, I don't even know anymore, it's confusing, really.

We look the same. Her hair is still blond and long, just like mine. Face is still pale and unmarred. However, to someone with a good sense of perception, it is obvious we are not the _same_ woman. I can feel it, I can see it… Her eyes are empty; they lack the usual bright shine mine have. Only a few days separate her from me, and I can't believe the change would be so great. Her dull eyes are our secret. The reason for their emptiness can only be one, and only us, Lucy'_s,_ know it. I feel my heart constrict more at each second that passes, beating erratically at the idea of the eminent future.

_He's gone._

Future Lucy's eyes are the mirror of my life without my most important person. My precious friend. My cherished and daily companion. My strength in the hard moments. _My Natsu_.

And I'm terrified...I'm terrified because I managed to understand and see what the future holds. And I want to run away from that reality, I _need_ to change it! Losing all of my friends would be painful, but losing Natsu… It would break me for life, just like it broke my future self. Yes, she's broken beyond repair. And I believe having Natsu comforting her the way he is, will only torn her even more.

I'm right… kind of? Future Lucy shares a quick look with me, and conveys all she's feeling in that instant. Pain. Despair. Sorrow. And, hope?

It is hope, a little spark of it, but still! And as I look at Natsu, I realize: he's still here. Future Lucy's reality is yet to happen, we can still change it!

A new power and resolve fills me. I won't allow myself that horrid future again, I'll fight against it.

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We're on the move again, going forward to change destiny. And as sudden as everything else that has been happening, tragedy meets our path. My future self is murdered. And… it was supposed to be _me_. Her last words pierce my heart. She didn't die complete. A huge part of Lucy was missing, and she felt she had more to give. Her adventure ended too soon.

I don't want that for me… Right now, the future is uncertain. But one thing I know for sure: future Lucy's mistakes won't be mine.

When the battle is finally over, when our fate is changed, when all is good again, and everyone is by our side, I feel _her. _I shed her tears, her happy tears! She found solace; she's with _him_ once more! And just like that, my need grows. I need to be next to Natsu.

And so, I go. And I hug him from behind, his warmth providing me the comfort I've been lacking ever since I saw _myself_ without him in my life.

_Thank you_. It sounds like the right thing to say after he saved _our_ future. But I don't stop there. I can't. Taking a deep breath to calm my racing heart I finally get the courage to change my life forever.

"She loved you… future Lucy." I'm still hugging him from behind, dry tears adorn my face. My eyes are closed, my cheek resting against his back, and I can only feel him. I feel his muscles tense, and I can't help but let out a sigh of relief. I was afraid he wouldn't react, that the word love wouldn't affect him. But it does… He's not completely abstracted to this feeling that consumes my entire soul.

"H-How do you know that?" his voice trembles slightly and I feel his body starting to turn. I open my eyes to look at him, only to find his glued to my face. He seems taken aback, doubting my words. I have the perfect argument to support what I just said.

"Because, Natsu, we're the same person." I keep staring at him, unable to look away despise the deep blush that is now part of my dirtied cheeks. His doubtful eyes are now wide open in wonder. He gets what I mean; I don't need to explain it any further. I let a small nervous smile show. Even though I know he understands me, I'm not confident he'll do anything about it. It's Natsu we're talking about after all...

Slowly, his body shifts completely to face me. I let my arms fall as I notice his silence. He's just _staring_ at me. I start to regret this decision, maybe I've ruined everything. His friendship is too valuable to lose over _love_. I could live with how we were, right?

No, of course not, who am I kidding? After seeing future Lucy misery due to a life without Natsu, I had to at least try having him completely… Maybe I'm being selfish… Oh no, I really am… Natsu doesn't deserve to bear this weight on his shoulders, especially since we are constantly together.

He's still silent as I start to pull back, we are too close… I'm starting to feel claustrophobic. In that instant, strong hot hands grab my shoulders and I speak on instinct.

"I'm sorry, Natsu, maybe I shouldn't have said that…" I look up at him again, forcing a smile. I don't want him to see me troubled. However, I see _him_ troubled.

"Why not? You don't want to love me?" That idiot…

"Of course I want to love you, baka! I want to love all of you! Actually, I love you so much that I can't bear the pain of not having you to love!" I blurb it so quickly that Natsu has a hard time getting all I just said. Tears are pooling in my eyes but I refuse to let them fall.

Natsu's hands let go of my shoulders and his arms wrap tightly around me. His hug is so strong, so warm… I fail as a single tear falls down my face and lands on his arm.

"We changed the future, Lucy. I _won't _lose you again… You-You'll always have _me_". My head turns up quickly to stare at him. He's blushing so hard that a smile finds easily a way to my lips.

"You promise?" I don't need to hear him say those special words; Natsu just gave himself to me, the same way I gave myself to him.

"Yeah, and I always keep my promises!" he says smiling, still with a blush, and tenderness in his eyes.

Overwhelmed with happiness, something I never thought I would feel after such events, I raise myself on my tiptoes and slowly kiss Natsu's cheek. As I pull away, I let out a small laugh at his awed expression. Smiling at him once again, I caress the same cheek I just kissed.

"I know you do." I say as he reaches up and puts his hand over mine.

"Good." Natsu's calm voice reaches my ears, at the same time my eyes see him slowly inching forward. I meet him halfway.

Natsu is my lifeline, and I am his. We seal our future with a kiss.

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May the future smile brightly, our OTP deserves it :3

Yours truly, R'Peach *


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